If someone falls overboard on a cruise ship, and there is a life preserver on the wall next to you, you throw them the life preserver.
Yes, it would be great if the ship had better railings so no one fell overboard to begin with. Yes, it would be awesome if everyone knew how to swim well enough to save themselves even in such a wild event as falling off a ship, but that’s not a standard thing that’s taught most places right now.
Yes, it probably is a good idea to know how to swim before you go on a ship, but even if you know how to swim, the act of falling into the water can startle anyone into panicking, so you don’t really have time to ask them if they can swim or not before they need the life preserver. Yes, being careful around the railings is a good idea, but you have no way to know right now whether they were doing it for the Vine or someone just tried to murder them, and either way do you actually think they deserve to die for not being 100% careful 24/7?
No, you should not be expected to jump in and try to rescue them yourself when you aren’t trained and don’t know them, but that’s not what anyone’s asking you to do. They just want you to grab the life preserver off the wall and throw it towards them, or even to just hand it to someone who can aim well if you’re worried about being held responsible if you miss, or hell, you can just get out of the way so someone else can grab it off the wall.
Don’t deprive someone of help right now just because in your ideal world, they wouldn’t need it. People asking for accommodations within the current system aren’t trying to uphold it, they are trying to survive and improve their lives, so don’t deny them those because in the system you want to have in place they wouldn’t need that accommodation.
Don’t deprive someone of help right now just because you’re morally inclined to believe they “deserved it”. You don’t know anyone else’s situation, you can never have full context, and quite often, the time and effort it takes to pass judgement on someone’s worthiness is more burden on everyone than just giving them the help. And even if you earnestly feel you don’t want to help them, why would you stop someone else from doing it? After all, even if your excuse is “to keep them from helping someone who doesn’t deserve it”, you felt the first person got what they deserved, so why would you think the person trying to help them doesn’t deserve any results too?
Put down your swim class brochure and either grab the life preserver or get out of the way so someone else can.
i shared something a few months ago about allergies and food disabilities and it recently started accumulating notes again and now it’s at 5.7k, so obviously my activity page is just people trauma dumping about their awful experiences with allergies in the tags which is. Fun.
but what’s really getting me is how i made a comment early on in the reblog chain about how many personal and professional activities revolve around food and how much it sucks to have to either put yourself at risk or miss out on those opportunities, because people often react badly either way if you cause them even the slightest inconvenience
and EVERYBODY who has responded to that comment. and I mean everybody. has focused on “personal” and made comments about how “if your friends don’t respect your food disabilities, they’re not your friends” and “you’ll meet more supportive people in future” and all of that
and not one of them has paid any attention to the “professional” part of that. I’m talking about work Christmas dinners where if you don’t go you’re not a team player and will probably get passed over for future opportunities, but if you go, you’ll get sick and HR will be mad about the extra time off. I’m talking about networking dinners and business lunches and meeting people at the buffet table at events, all of which are fraught if not impossible. I’m talking about travelling for conferences or other events and having to bring an entire extra bag with food because the venue can’t cater for you (hand luggage only just ain’t even an option at this point, so yay, extra costs if you’re travelling further afield)
and also! smaller things like job interviews where you have to wear “smart” clothes (fitted waistbands and IBS? A Nightmare). dress codes in general. working in a building where the nearest toilets are on the opposite side. not being able to trust the work kettle/microwave because it might be contaminated but not having the facilities to bring/use your own. not being able to use communal tea/coffee/milk supplies for the same reason. all of those little everyday things
it isn’t just about friends. it’s about LIFE. i’m in an industry where events, lunches, etc are a common occurrence, and a nightmare for me. in academia, it feels like every other event involves a wine reception, which is shit when you don’t drink and don’t love being around people who are drinking a lot. in the office, i can’t participate properly in any of the seasonal social gatherings, whether they’re tea and biscuits or a Christmas meal
food disabilities have PROFESSIONAL impacts. because they are disabilities. it isn’t just about having fun or hanging out with friends. it affects my career and my opportunities and it is INVISIBLE because people don’t even know to recognise the ableism when they’re doing it
i am tired of people ignoring that facet of it all
As a teenager growing up in Ontario, I always envied the kids who spent their summers tree planting; they’d come back from the bush in September, insect-chewed and leathery, with new muscle, incredible stories, thousands of dollars, and a glow imparted by the knowledge that they’d made a new forest with their own blistered hands.
I was too unathletic to follow them into the bush, but I spent my summers doing my bit, ringing doorbells for Greenpeace to get my neighbours fired up about the Canadian pulp-and-paper industry, which wasn’t merely clear-cutting our old-growth forests – it was also poisoning the Great Lakes system with PCBs, threatening us all.
At the time, I thought of tree-planting as a small victory – sure, our homegrown, rapacious, extractive industry was able to pollute with impunity, but at least the government had reined them in on forests, forcing them to pay my pals to spend their summers replacing the forests they’d fed into their mills.
I was wrong. Last summer’s Canadian wildfires blanketed the whole east coast and midwest in choking smoke as millions of trees burned and millions of tons of CO2 were sent into the atmosphere. Those wildfires weren’t just an effect of the climate emergency: they were made far worse by all those trees planted by my pals in the eighties and nineties.
Writing in the New York Times, novelist Claire Cameron describes her own teen years working in the bush, planting row after row of black spruces, precisely spaced at six-foot intervals:
Cameron’s summer job was funded by the logging industry, whose self-pegulated, self-assigned “penalty” for clearcutting diverse forests of spruce, pine and aspen was to pay teenagers to create a tree farm, at nine cents per sapling (minus camp costs).
Black spruces are made to burn, filled with flammable sap and equipped with resin-filled cones that rely on fire, only opening and dropping seeds when they’re heated. They’re so flammable that firefighters call them “gas on a stick.”
A 16th century German ‘oath skull’ (a human skull on which defendants swore their oath in Vehmic courts) engraved with the 'magical’ Roman 'Sator square’, mysterious palindromic word-squares found across the Roman world, comprising the words SATOR, AREPO, TENET, OPERA, ROTAS
ALT
ALT
